I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
