There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
The adults are the big ones right?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
