I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I AM VODKA MAN
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
