I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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