Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
