All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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