i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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