If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
