Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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