shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Randomize
