Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
