have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I am one with the molecules
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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