Three words: puerto rican gang bang
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
