i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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