I heard we made out
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
