He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
