I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
