rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
