You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Dear god my vagina.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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