5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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