Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
