I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
