she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
