He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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