It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize