I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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