do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I love you. Go after that dick
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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