She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
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