The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
