My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
