That's intense
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
