Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
