Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I just sucked dick on a ferry
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
