Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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