Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
