don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
