Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize