Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize