a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
