Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize