Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
