I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
