I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
