I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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