He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I just want to make out with him forever
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
