Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
