Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
