just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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