Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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