Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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