I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
